ETIQUETTE
Mastering the art of thank-you notes
Even in an online world, it is still important to mail handwritten notes.
By Debbie Juniewicz Contributing Writer
It is a thoughtful and polite gesture that can also be professionally advantageous. It is inexpensive and requires little effort but can make someone’s day. Your mother likely nagged you to do it and etiquette experts attest to its value, but it has also been referred to as a dying art. It is sending a handwritten thank-you note. It’s not just thank-you notes but also letters, cards and other traditional mailed items such as bills that have seen a sharp decline in volume in recent years. The United States Postal Service reported a mail volume decline of 43.1 billion pieces in the past five years. While email, social media and cell phones enable people to be more connected than ever before, etiquette experts say there is no substitute for a sincere, handwritten thank-you note. “It used to be that’s all we did,” said Leah Hawthorn, etiquette coach and director of Advanced Business Image & Etiquette in Kettering. “Now, am I horrified if my thank you is in an email? No — it is 2011. But there are times you should not send anything other than a handwritten thank-you note.” Those times include a graduation, wedding and job interview. The basics A gift, a dinner, a favor, even, an interview — might all warrant a thank-you note. “If you are not sure whether or not a thank-you note is called for, send one anyway,” Hawthorn said. “A note of appreciation is always welcome.” And time is of the essence. Emilypost.com recommends, “the sooner the better. But don’t be embarrassed by a note sent a bit late, even a month after the gift was received. It’s far better to send a late note than no note at all.” According to Hawthorn, one day is the optimal thank-you turnaround. “Write a thank-you note within 24 hours of an occasion while everything is fresh in your memory,” she said. “A handwritten note will make you appear attentive, professional and sincere in your thanks.” There are a few exceptions to the rule, as she recommends deadlines of one month for graduation presents and three months for wedding gifts. But writing notes as the gifts are received will make the task less daunting. A few thank-you notes a week is much more manageable than 30 or 40 at once. Simple and sincere There is no magic formula for writing a thank-you note. The age of the writer should be the first consideration. Emily Post suggests that children use art supplies like markers, stamps or stickers to make the project fun and personal. Older children and teens can focus on what the gift meant to them, whether it was a book they were dying to read or a gift card that helped them buy their new dorm room comforter. People like to know that their gift was appreciated and remembered. You can even take a picture of your daughter wearing her new sweater or your son and his new dorm-sized refrigerator and include it with the note. The gift recipient should also address the envelope, a task that is unfamiliar to some young people but will be greatly appreciated by grandmothers and family friends, alike. If it is a post-interview note, simply thank the interviewer for their time and reiterate your interest in the company or position. This can be done succinctly on a professional looking correspondence card. “It’s uncommon, any more, to send one (thank-you note) so if you want to stand out from the crowd and outclass the competition, this is what you need to do,” Hawthorn said. “And I think everyone, no matter what the occasion, loves to get a special thank you.”